WanderingWarrior
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Member # 7508
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My Husband and I were trapped into such a church,not realizing their agenda was promotion of their particular traditions, and beliefs that they should have the right to control and manipulate others.
It could have been a group from any denomination,or an independant church. I do not state the name of the group here, because it could happen in any group.
We innocently, accepted a position as interum pastor/and wife,and were eventually installed full time. We did not ,at first realize that there was any agenda other than to love the Lord Jesus,teach others the word,and grow in God, helping others to do so as well.
It was a political ploy, w/in this group to gain more time to get a Minister/couple that would be 'Yes Persons' for them.
People who don't dress a certain way, are not welcome there. Sinners who want to learn the ways of the Lord,and be saved,are made to feel they are not good enough.
"...Eeewww, they stink,they don't know how to show proper reverance in the church building... we don't want that kind of person here...".
There are usually at least three Influnecer types when this happens. The main influencer-Bully, a secondary,often passive aggressive person, deflecting away from the main bully, and a practical joker type...
In our case, My husband crossed the 'Main Bully type', in trying to help sort a problem. ANd that person took ought against him. He had tried to resolve an issue,w/ much prayer and kindness. That person wanted it resolved their way, regardless of how many folk migth be confused,or hurt by it.
Main bully type was a 'glory hound' ,wanting ... huge recognition for the littlelest of things. They enjoyed making pretty parties,and yes, had a talent for it. But make sure,everyone knows the sacrifice that Influnecer One Bully had to do... isn't it grand.
" Oh yes, Christmas is the time we...traditonally reach out into the community,and tell others of Jesus..." . Sadly after to many pretty parties,and Long long long, well over three hours at a sitting long tiem. Folks began to refuse to participate... they ahd children who needed to be home at reasonable hours etc. Then these famillies were bullied until some of them left... some of them actually had items stolen, that they had purchased to help the childrens dept. Head influencer took things for their own use.
This is only a couple of examples. We are out of this mess now, but it has been the hardest most difficult thing in our lives. We have been shunned ,lied about,lied to and ignored.
It was difficult,and I don't want in anyway to seem judgemental... I don't know how else to begin to explain what we've been going thru. And we lost hubbys 'secular jobs' and our housing in the midst of this all,along w/ my mother dying unexpectedly.
Toxic faith churches may seem normal on the surface, but be everso watchful...please be watchful. A dear friend called this type of situation 'Preacher eaters...' the old rumormongers having Pastor and family for Dinner,when the Pastor and family aren't there.
There are some traditions that are preciaous...but puttin anyone person,before the Lord, anyone way of doing things above Him and His Word is wrong...
So many ugly litte things happened... we prayed,and we tried to keep things sorted out... they didn't want to hear what teh Lord was saying...these folk wanted to hear 'Phroph-a-lies' about how good and righteous and holy they were...how everyone should dress just so...and speak just so...and think just so... for that is how it was to appear Christian in their little world.
The Lord calls us to become more and more like Him...Not more and more like a cookie-cutter versions of 'Brother and Sister So and So...and their Particular In-Crowd.
When children are hurt and leave,crushed to the point of tears,becuse of ugly and mean spirited gossip, not by other childern,but by supposed adults,in Leadership positions...something is wrong in such a church.
So many things happened, and when we tried to bring about peace and resolution, in a Godly and scriptural manner...we were forced to resign. We had no place to go...we have a roof over our heads,but aren't in the best of circumnstances. We ran up against the 'We were here when you came,we'll be here when you leave ,this is Our church,ourway..." etc...
Again, I d n't know how to explain any better,right now... we found out that this 'church' has had a History of this kind of thing...w/ Pastors. Oviously we must have missed something somewhere...we prayed,sought the Lords will,and so on. it eneded in heart ache.
We are not in formal Ministry at this time. We are taking a 'sabbatical',after over 30 years working in various ministries.
If you start into a church,or are already in one...where constant complaining is going on, w/ 'leaders' fighting against 'leaders',and gossip running rampant,in the church and about the people...please please please be watchful.
Don't participate in the gossip and choosing up sides etc. Leave if need be. Don't let your children,family members and friends be ridiculed for the cause of somebodies power ploys.
Ridicule, for the cause of Christ is a different matter...but when it is because of human power plays it is wrong,and may lead others to fall away from the Lord,especially the young,and those young in the Lord.
I hope I am understandable... illness sometimes doesn't let me say things as clearly as I would like.
Just the Wandering Warrior
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I am a poor wayfaring stranger...
Posts: 7 | From: Idaho | Registered: Nov 2008
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