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Author
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Topic: Sobering Issues - Modesty
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Itty-Bitty Girl
Advanced Member
Member # 4579
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posted
quote:
Originally posted by David:
Just remember you are only responsible for what YOU do. So if YOU decide to dress in a provoking way, then YOU and only YOU will answer for it.
But you can do as you please and answer for it on judgement day.
Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are FEW who find it.
Matthew 7:14 (NKJV)
Exactly right.
Posts: 1051 | Registered: Apr 2005
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KnowHim
Admin
Member # 1
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posted
“And if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck.
Mark 9:42 (NIV)
This is our Lord’s longest and most awesome warning about future punishment. If we are not serving others (v. 35), we may cause others to stumble (“offend,” v. 42); and this might lead to their eternal condemnation. We must deal drastically with sin in our lives, both for our sake and the sake of others, for the fires of hell are real and everlasting. Jesus compared hell to a furnace (Matt. 13:42) and an unquenchable fire.
Just remember you are only responsible for what YOU do. So if YOU decide to dress in a provoking way, then YOU and only YOU will answer for it.
But you can do as you please and answer for it on judgement day.
Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are FEW who find it.
Matthew 7:14 (NKJV)
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Posts: 3276 | From: Charlestown, IN | Registered: Jun 2002
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Itty-Bitty Girl
Advanced Member
Member # 4579
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posted
quote:
Originally posted by becauseHElives:
If I give in to the temptations based on what I see, I am guilty of sinning. However, you women who think you are absolved from responsibility in this area are wrong. Why make it difficult for me and your brothers? Why not love me as a brother in Christ and dress in a way that does not make me conscious of what I used to do and be?
I know, that ish is not right. Yo, I hate when people do that stuff. That is so disgusting, that is not hot, that’s nasty. And do you know what I hate even more? I hate when people criticize and judge others about dressing in such a disrespectful way in public when they do the same.
ST. MATTHEW 7:1-5 Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thy say to thy brother, Let me pull the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and thou shall see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.
Have yall heard of this singing group named Destiny’s Child? They profess to be Christians. I hate it that they criticized and judged people who dress scantily clad in public in their song “Nasty Girl”, when they do the same thing.
“You nasty girl, you nasty you trashy
You classless girl, you sleazy you freaky
I ain't never met a girl that does the things that you do
Change don't come your way it will come back to you
Put some clothes on girl”
-“Destiny's Child - Nasty Girl”
“You make it hard...for girls like myself who respect themselves
And have dignity
You nasty girl, you nasty, you trashy
You classless girl, you sleazy, you freaky
N-A-S-T-Y ya nasty, F-R-E-A-K ya freaky
Girl where's your P-R-I-D-E, put some clothes on”
-“Destiny's Child - Nasty Girl”
Now if yall google image search, "Destiny's Child"... yall are bound to see them looking, nasty, trashy, classless, etc. Their filth is all over the net.
They are hypocrites. They are a self-righteous stumbling block!
Romans 2:1-3 Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doeth the same things. But we are sure that the judgment of God is according to truth against them which commit such things. And thinkest thou this, O man, that judgest them which do such things, and doest the same, that thou shalt escape the judgment of God?
I really hate to see fake Christians walking around.
Where all the warriors at?
Posts: 1051 | Registered: Apr 2005
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ahar
Advanced Member
Member # 5810
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posted
quote:
Originally posted by helpforhomeschoolers:
Rape is not a crime of lust it is a crime of hate, power, agression, dominence. I dont care if a woman is standing naked, she does not ever deserve to be sexually assaulted or abused.
Very true. Men (and the extremely small number of women, generally concerning children) who commit rape are usually gaining some sexual gratification from the act of power and dominance rather than lust as we may think of it..
quote:
Originally posted by helpforhomeschoolers:
As far as dress of women in the middle east, I have often wondered if it is possible that it is so extreem that it leads to lusting because it causes one to have to use their imagination. Do you think that is possible? Is it possible that extreem one way or the other is bad?
Reading Brian Keenan's book (An Evil Cradling) about the time that he spent with Hezbollah after being kidnapped in Lebanon, he paints a very interesting picture of the men that watched over him being obsessed with the topic of sex. They would continually make comments and ask questions about western women, casual sex, pornography etc. He doesn't make any conclusions as to why this is the case, but I don't think that it's too far a leap to theorise that the almost opposite to objectification of women within Arab society is partly the cause of this.
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Cheers
Andy
Posts: 290 | From: UK | Registered: Jun 2006
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helpforhomeschoolers
Advanced Member
Member # 15
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posted
No, It would not likely surprise me; it would probably shame me. Recently I went to a Chrisitian Music Event that is held in the city that is near us... 70 miles or so away from us. It is an annual event. We have been going for years, and it used to be a very nice time... three days in the park, families and church friends just having fellowship and worshiping Jesus and enjoying the day and the music and the family time together. Well, the last time that we went, I was so frustrated that I thought that I would not go again. The church is so worldly and I will spare you the details, but I just felt that we would not go again. However, this year when the time rolled around, we had decided to go... mainly because I was going to man a booth for my favorite evangelistic organization and give out free books and talk to people about supporting native missionaries to the 10/40... as you may know from reading the people of Asia, particularly in this region really tug at my heart strings and they need so desperately to hear about Jesus..
Any way, this weekend, the heat was almost unbearable. In fact, we had the nation's high right here in SD on Saturday and it was a recordbreaking 120 degreees. My friend, I have never seen such imodesty and among church people!!! The things I saw... the way that women were dressed, I could not circulate pictures of without being accused of circulatiing pornography. I was sickening. I was embarassed. I am not of the mind that one has to wear a burka... but there is no ... no excuse for the kinds of things that I saw this weekend. If modesty really is a reflection of the condition of one's heart and I believe that it is, then I am very very afraid for the people of the church in my neck of the woods as they say.
Posts: 4684 | From: Southern Black Hills of South Dakota | Registered: Jun 2002
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Eduardo Grequi
Advanced Member
Member # 3984
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posted
you are absolutely right, however when it concerns modesty- I think modesty is beautiful. I am personnal turned off of by people who do not dress respectful. To me trust is a big issue and people who flaunt it must not be very trustworthy. Believe it or not rape has increased 300% since WHO INVESTIGATIONS OF CRIMES AGAINST WOMEN.
Modesty should be define within your culture. There are two cultures in America. Culture of Americanism and the Culture of Religious orders. Be as it may- It would surprise you which contegorary has major problem with modesty.
Posts: 771 | From: Belvidere, IL | Registered: Oct 2004
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helpforhomeschoolers
Advanced Member
Member # 15
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posted
Rape is not a crime of lust it is a crime of hate, power, agression, dominence. I dont care if a woman is standing naked, she does not ever deserve to be sexually assaulted or abused.
As far as dress of women in the middle east, I have often wondered if it is possible that it is so extreem that it leads to lusting because it causes one to have to use their imagination. Do you think that is possible? Is it possible that extreem one way or the other is bad?
Posts: 4684 | From: Southern Black Hills of South Dakota | Registered: Jun 2002
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Eduardo Grequi
Advanced Member
Member # 3984
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posted
I remember some years ago about a high school student who got raped because she wore clothes like a prostitute. I believe it took place in Madisone, Wisconsin. They went to court and Jury said the boy was not guilty. In the end, when asked after a post review- The jury Madame said because she dress the part and got what she deserved. This has to be atleast 30 years ago.
Some times I understand why women in the middle east must dress in a robe because it helps to prevent mental adultrey but nowadays in Isreal you do not find a dress code.
Posts: 771 | From: Belvidere, IL | Registered: Oct 2004
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helpforhomeschoolers
Advanced Member
Member # 15
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posted
Luke 12:51 Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division:
52 For from henceforth there shall be five in one house divided, three against two, and two against three.
53 The father shall be divided against the son, and the son against the father; the mother against the daughter, and the daughter against the mother; the mother in law against her daughter in law, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Lonesol: I am sorry that you are hurting. I know that you have done all that you can do to be faithful through this. It seems that it is out of your control and you are going to have to just trust GOD. You can continue to pray for your daughter and I know that you will. We dont know why God is allowing this, but we do know that while HIS ways are not our ways, HIS ways are perfect. God is able to reach her. You just have to keep praying. As for yourself.. HE will be your husband, and HE will use this time to grow you and draw you closer to HIM. Every earthly one that we know can forsake us, BUT our heavenly Father will never forsake us.
I pray for your peace and strengthening of your faith sister. Please know that even now, no matter how things look on the surface GOD is in control.
Ps 125:1 They that trust in the LORD shall be as mount Zion, which cannot be removed, but abideth for ever.
Pr 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
Posts: 4684 | From: Southern Black Hills of South Dakota | Registered: Jun 2002
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lonlesol
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Member # 4511
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posted
I have accepted Jesus as my Savior two years ago. Unfortunately since then, my married life has suffered greatly...it has now come to an end...
We have a 15 year old daughter that likes to dress like her friends do that is not necessarily appropriate. Nothing I say makes any difference, she simply will not listen to me...
I also have a very soon to be ex-husband as he demanded divorce on Father's Day...our daughter decided to go live with her father because she says that I am too strict with her, she won't come live with me, she would rather be with him. He wants to have full custody of our daughter...he sent her to his mother's house for the summer, in other words, he got rid of her until school starts...
In their minds, I am a nut and in the wrong for reading the Bible and spending time studying it and going to Church. They won't accept that I spend time on the internet on a certain board to help others and pray for them....
Last summer, I wanted to please him so I went to a mechoui party with my husband and daughter. Big mistake, I should have stayed home with our daughter...His friends are militaries, he is military himself...some of the adults there, gave alcool beverages to my daughter that was 14 years old at the time. I got very upset once I found out since she did this behind my back and my husband didn't seem to find anything wrong with that...I left early and they stayed there for the night to continue on partying. Our daughter did not want to come home with me...of course, she finally got sick from too much drinking...
Something else happened last summer...very bad and very wrong...Our daughter had a boyfriend at the time and that boyfriend had a cousin...She practiced on doing something on the cousin so she wouldn't look like she never did it before once she would decide to do it with her boyfriend...I tried to explain to her that what she did with that cousin was very wrong and soooo disrespectful for herself and for that young guy and also for her boyfriend...
The schools in Quebec provide the pill for young girls. They provide condoms as well. They also go as far as providing abortion if the girls get pregnant, all of this without the consentment of the parents...what kind of world do we live in!!!...
Soooo many other disturbing things have happened in the last few years...but I will stop here...
I spent 21 days at the hospital recently because I had a nervous breakdown following my husband's demand of divorce, I got out of there this past Monday...
Pity is not what I am looking for but I am sooo discouraged right now...I just can't understand why they consider me to be the bad one in all of this...I just wish to follow Jesus and for us to do the right thing and they decided that I am not good enough for them anymore...they are obviously not saved and are not interested at all...I have tried everything to save our marriage, it simply wasn't good enough...they blame me...
I am sorry, I just needed to write this down... ![[Frown]](frown.gif)
Posts: 478 | From: Quebec | Registered: Mar 2005
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helpforhomeschoolers
Advanced Member
Member # 15
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posted
quote:
I turned to my husband and said, why would her parents let her walk out of the house looking like that? It truly puzzles me that parents allow this.
And then you see their parents!
I recently went with my youngest to a graduation reception of a friend of hers who is a senior this year. One of the mothers there was wearing shorts that were so short there was probably not 1/2 of leg material on them, and a tank top with scoop neck and skinny straps over the shoulder and flip flops. She was very tan, fit and trim... maybe a runner or something.. very attractive,hair perfect, nails mannicured,her manner was not trashy, she is very affluent in our small community. They live in maybe a 1/2 million dollar home so I am sure there is no shortage of clothing choices in her closet. But this was her choice of dress for the day.
Who can figure?
I dont know how any man there did not turn their head when she walked in.. I turned my head when she walked in! Maybe grown men can bring their flesh into subjection but what about teen age boys whose hormones are already in overdrive? This is a very nice woman to visit with. Her daughter and my daughter often do things together and the daughter is very well mannered polite and does not dress out of line at any time that I have seen. But her mother! She just did not think past herself. I can only hope that the fact that the daughter is friendly with several of the girls from my daughter's youth group that she continues to be influence in a positive way by the church because she certainly is getting no modesty training at home.
Posts: 4684 | From: Southern Black Hills of South Dakota | Registered: Jun 2002
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TEXASGRANDMA
Advanced Member
Member # 847
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posted
we had a teenager who wore very short dresses to Church. This came to a stop when one of the little boys announced to his friend in a loud voice that the girl has on purple panties. From then on she wore longer dresses or pants. ![[Wink]](wink.gif)
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Luk 21:28 And when these things begin to come to pass, then look up, and lift up your heads; for your redemption draweth nigh.
http://www.indieheaven.com/artists/mm (son-in-law)http://www.myspace.com/mireles
Posts: 4985 | From: Washington State | Registered: Jan 2003
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Cricket
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Member # 2960
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posted
quote:
The trouble is today, too many girls want the boys to look... they want the boys to lust.
I totally agree. It amazes me what some young girls wear. We went to a wedding reception this weekend and saw a sophomore in HS in a dress that was very short, slinky and showed way too much cleavage. I turned to my husband and said, why would her parents let her walk out of the house looking like that? It truly puzzles me that parents allow this.
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What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?
---Vincent Van Gogh
Posts: 56 | From: Illinois | Registered: Mar 2004
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helpforhomeschoolers
Advanced Member
Member # 15
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posted
I have tried to impress upon my girls this responsibility. I want them to think this way..We are no supposed to cause another to stumble. We are supposed to want to keep our brother from sinning.
The trouble is today, too many girls want the boys to look... they want the boys to lust. We live in a society that denies sin and the professing church is afraid to call sin sin. Our failure to do so puts the world's blood on our hands I fear. We have to teach our children that sin is sin and is to be avoided... we have to teach them to fear hell and have reverence for GOD. We have to teach them that GOD is HOLY and GOD is not mocked!
We live in a society that leads women to believe that it is good for us to cause men to loose their minds over us. We live in a society that tells women every day they are more womanly when they do this and tells men that women who dont do this are not desireable.
Modesty begins in the heart. It begins with a heart that says dont look at me, look at Jesus. I was writing yesterday, about Paul.. for Paul to LIVE WAS CHRIST.
When to LIVE IS CHRIST for us... it means that this is what we want people to see when they look at us.. We want them to see Christ. We do not want them to see us except to see ... there goes Linda a servant of Christ... or there goes Dale a servant of Christ.
When this is our mind, then our mind is not how can I make them notice me more.. it is how can they notice more of Christ in me.
I dont think that you have to wear long dresses to your ankles to dress modestly. I think it is entirely possible to dress conservatively and not cause people to lust even in a pair of shorts if not too short or tight.
I do think, however that it would be wonderful to wear long dresses and cover my head because it does make a statement to the world about our not being part of the world. I do like that, but I dont think that it is necessary to do these things to be modest.
Posts: 4684 | From: Southern Black Hills of South Dakota | Registered: Jun 2002
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becauseHElives
Advanced Member
Member # 87
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posted
Any woman who does not believe a young man (any normal male) struggles daily against visual temptation is simple.
Dear Debi,
I have truly enjoyed your book Created to Be His Help Meet. It has been a blessing to me and many of my friends. I have given it to many ladies, and some have questions about the way you put things. Some ladies take exception to the story of the lady who wears the tight skirt and the man’s reaction. They say, “She makes it sound like Lydia (Bathsheba) is responsible for his actions. Why didn’t the young man go for counselling? I don’t believe a normal young man has a constant, day to day sexual struggle against visual temptation. They don’t have to regardless of how a girl is dressed. This sounds too much like “If you dress like that, you are just asking to be raped.”
My husband downloads your messages, and he and his boss listen to them at work. He loves his job.
Leslie
Response:
A woman who does not believe a young man struggles daily against visual temptation is simple. Go look up “simple” in a KJV Bible to see what God thinks of “simple” people. I’ll go ahead and explain from my perspective, of once being sunk in the mire of visual temptation. A man’s eyes are drawn to pleasing shapes: the curves of a Corvette (1971 Stingray, being my favorite), the flowing stream as it goes around a bend, or the hips revealed by a tight clothes, tight enough to reveal whether the “lines” are there or not.
As a saved family man, I must adhere to the Bible command to entreat or regard “the younger [women] as sisters, with all purity” (1 Timothy 5:2), even if those sisters are dressed in a way that catches my eye. If I give in to the temptations based on what I see, I am guilty of sinning. However, you women who think you are absolved from responsibility in this area are wrong. Why make it difficult for me and your brothers? Why not love me as a brother in Christ and dress in a way that does not make me conscious of what I used to do and be? Mike has commented in the past about alcoholics who get saved. He admonishes them to stay away from places like bars, because the flesh has been conditioned to enjoy alcohol’s powers. Likewise, as a former porn reader, porn movie viewer who liked self-gratification to satisfy his wild drive, I don’t want to see those curves. I keep my eyes up. My wife edits magazines we get (like Popular Mechanics) which have those kinds of pictures, before I or my sons get to look at them, and that’s the way I want it.
I tell my boys about the dangers of a woman who dresses like “Lydia.” My son, 6 years old, sees women in public and observes how they dress. “Daddy, is that a ‘strange lady?” He’s referring to the “strange woman” of Proverbs 7. I answer, “I don’t know if she is, but she certainly dresses like one.” And we have seen them at “church.” Do you want my son to look at you and think of you as a “strange lady”? How about your daughter, would my sons think she is strange? My sons won’t marry a woman who doesn’t respect a man’s propensity to visual temptation. They’ll marry a woman who reveals herself to them and them only.
My daughters won’t dress like a strange woman either. Mine, at only 9 years old, knows that she should keep her body from a man’s eyes, reserving it for her future husband. In the grocery store one day, when my daughter was wearing a skirt that flowed around her ankles, she heard another little girl (dressed in shorts) point to my daughter and comment to her own mother, “Look, Mom, she’s beautiful!” Why not dress beautifully rather than like a **** ? You should get out of your ignorance before your dinner guest looks at you or your daughter then visits the bathroom. Well, that’s probably already happened.
http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/index.php?id=77&tx_ttnews[tt_news]=249&tx_ttnews[backPID]=7
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Strive to enter in at the strait gate:for many, I say unto you will seek to enter in, and shall not be able. ( Luke 13:24 )
Posts: 4578 | From: Southeast Texas | Registered: Jun 2002
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