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Author
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Topic: Need prayer
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LaurieFL
Advanced Member
Member # 3794
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posted
Amen, Sister Linda. Much of what you say has great meaning for me and revelations along those lines have been part of this process of my being changed. I am praying that the Lord show me a way to serve in whatever I do, and I believe as you do that he will show me the way.
What you said about something sort of being under my nose but not what I expected is what led me to make the step to apply to grad school here this week. I have my M.S. in my field, but never finished my PhD. I don't want to finish it out of ego, but it occurred to me the other day that I have always wanted to go to this University and have in fact been accepted a couple of times but never went due to it being difficult to let go of income when I had a steady job!
Now, I am here, have no job weighing me down, and they have a good program for biomedical applications, which I am thinking may be a way to apply my skills for God's glory. I am praying and praying about it though, because I know that "there is a way that seems wise to a man, but in the end brings only death."
Thank you all for your support and prayers!
Hallelujah! Glory to God in All Things!
Posts: 700 | Registered: Aug 2004
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helpforhomeschoolers
Advanced Member
Member # 15
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posted
Hi Laurie:
I am sorry I missed your prayer request previously. I wanted to encourage you. Being out of work for so long is so hard. We too went through more than an 18 month trip without work for almost 2 years a few years back, Had it not been for the faith and grace and mercy of our church family we would have lost everything. As it was we never really were without anything. So much of who we are is tied up in what we do. During this time God used our situation to teach us that who we are is NOT what we do; but who we are is who he is in us. We are nothing accept that which he is in us. For us it was easy to put the work we did with him and for him in a box labeled church; and what we did to earn a living in a box labeled career or life's work. But during this time, HE caused us to see that he gives the power to get wealth for HIS purpose and HIs glory. This was a time when he was becoming our life rather than being a part of our lives.
I think Mohawk is absolutely right in his assessment that God is honing you. My ear was especially tweaked to hear that you are a scientist, because I so very much believe that God has given some a passion for science that they may use science to bring him glory. So much of science is about bringing the other camp glory. Maybe this is what God is doing right now. Maybe he is showing you that your skills and your talent and your education, and your passion is FOR HIM. I don't know what kind of scientist you are or how that will look in the real world, but I am sure that you, by the power of HIS Spirit do know now or will very shortly. Maybe the answer to your praying and praying is right under your nose, but you expect it to look differently and so you have not seen it??? It gives me goose bumps to think about the possibilities of what God may have in store for you! Maybe this practice of your craft wont bring the income that you might have earned using it in some other and less glorifying way? Maybe God had to get your hubby in a place to take up that slack. Don't let desperation keep you so busy looking in other places for work that you miss the opportunity God may have for you in your field to serve HIM. I don't want to assume that you have not prayed this way, if you have continue to do so, but if you have not, then pray that HE will show you how HE wants you to serve HIM with this Talent he has given you. To often our work is how we serve our egos or our sense of self that should be a sense of HIM in Self. Too often our work is how we serve our material needs and desires or even our desires to see his work done, a means for our giving or tithing... but I am talking about something greater... I am talking about HIS using our work as a means to build his kingdom and bring HIM glory. I don't know if I am able to express what I desire to say here. But I pray God will allow it to make sense to your ears.
At any rate. Don't be discouraged; be encouraged, be excited, because every trial is an opportunity for GOD to move and to use us and our circumstance for HIS glory. What a marvelous thing to be given the opportunity to be part of!!!
God Bless you and Keep you Laurie, and may his perfect will for your life, all your life, including your work life, become increasingly clear for you.
In Christ,
Linda
Posts: 4684 | From: Southern Black Hills of South Dakota | Registered: Jun 2002
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HisGrace
unregistered
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posted
Wow Laurie - a totally turnaround from your first post - God is awesome. ![[clap2]](graemlins/clap2.gif)
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LaurieFL
Advanced Member
Member # 3794
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posted
I just wanted to thank all of you who prayed or have been praying. I can only say that the Lord has made a revolutionary change in my attitude in a very short time. I no longer feel overwhelmed or lonely at home. The cooking issues are getting much better too. I know some of that stuff may seem trivial to many people, but it was part of an important lesson God is teaching me and a work he is perfecting in me.
As for the career stuff, well I felt moved to apply to go back to school. The funny thing is I got a call about a job at a company where I have always wanted to work yesterday - in the town we just moved away from! There may be some possibility of my being able to do it temporarily in order to earn some money to pay down our debts. I am praying that the Lord's will be done and that He show me the way in His wisdom.
As for my quest for a new church home, I have visited the Calvary Chapel here twice now. It is a sweet place, but not as "alive" as the church I was attending. I don't mean boisterous, it is difficult to explain. My church home before had a ton of goals and qwas growing and busy doing the Lord's work. The pastor refused to allow any member come week after week to be fed and get fat spiritually but not serve. It was a neat atmosphere.
This new church seems a bit more where perhaps people just go and get fed. In the ten years it has been open, there are still maybe only 50 people at a service, if that many. I believe maybe the Lord has something He may want me to do there though, so I plan to keep going for now, unless led to a different church. Some time back, I had a distinct experience where I felt the Lord specifically told me I would be going to Russia as a missionary. I was like..."Okay Lord, but you have to pave the way, because I have zero idea how to do something like that." Oddly enough, Calvary Chapel is DEVOTED to mission work and starting new churches in Russia. They have permanent teams over there. So, wow. Maybe this is why some of this has happened to me. I don't know, but will be praying and ask for your prayers as well.
(Interesting point for some folks like BHL - neither pastor at either church I attend gets a salary from the church. I find that to be refreshing, myself.)
Posts: 700 | Registered: Aug 2004
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Seraph
Advanced Member
Member # 3906
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posted
I am praying for you Laurie.
God Bless!
Posts: 62 | From: Ireland | Registered: Sep 2004
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HisGrace
unregistered
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posted
Laurie this scripture has been haunting me the past few days and I would like to share it with you.
John 3:30 He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.
Yes indeed it looks like the Lord is preparing you for something much bigger in your life. He wants to make sure you are well prepared and humbled, so that he can trust you to be yielding and totally submissive to his will.
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LaurieFL
Advanced Member
Member # 3794
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posted
Mohawk and His Grace, your words and support have touched me and blessed me. I thank you so much.
I too believe God is preparing me for something amazing,and I want to be the absolute best I can be before He puts me to it, so I will glorify Him and not fail Him! We have to be pruned and put through the fire and many other painful things in order for God to perfect and complete the work He has begun in us, and sometimes it becomes easy to focus on the hurt and to forget the purpose behind it, even if we do not know it.
Hallelujah and Praise God for His work and for you, my siblings in Christ!
Posts: 700 | Registered: Aug 2004
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mohawk
Advanced Member
Member # 2898
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posted
Laurie
What I say comes from one who understands your situation completely. For I have lived in a very similar one--and am doing so still, to a degree. Without boring you with my own history, let me say that I too chose a path where the doors of opportunity aren't exactly around every corner. A path that has dictated I make a variety of frustrating and disheartening "non-choices" while I hope, wait, pray and make what I hope are prudent, wise moves, for the right breaks (small and large) to happen.
Similar to yours... a profession that offers extremely high rewards when I get a foot in the door--but offers very little, if anything at all, if I don't.
Yet there is one question standing in my mind like a brick wall, against all that defeatist rationalizing:
Why did the Lord give me this deeper-than-the-ocean passion, and not just an aptitude but a TALENT for this thing, if He just intends to keep me held back from it all my life?
Somehow I just can't, and don't, accept that. My feeling is... you aren't so much being tested, but HONED. God puts us through "tests" to show US what we are capable of, and to give us an idea of our own limitations. There's nothing HE needs to find out--He already knows it; the very hairs on our heads are numbered, remember? I believe you are being prepared for something incredible, the time just isn't quite right for it yet.
Thank God that you have a husband, who can tow the line in these leaner times. The money may have been wonderful before, but a loving partner who shares your burdens is priceless. You are very rich. I wasn't so fortunate, though I had friends who offered hope. And I know now that the Lord was with me, I was just blinded to it by my depressed state.
Please don't jump to the conclusion that it's time to change professions. You spoke of obsessive ambition and ego... perhaps you are being re-oriented... so that you can, at some time in the future, re-enter the career field where your passion burns brightest, from a totally new viewpoint, guided by the love of the Holy Spirit instead of your own pride. That could be the lesson being administered. Be open to it.
His ways are above our ways. We sit at the crossroads, watching the train go by one boxcar at a time... God sees the entire train from above, from engine to caboose. God can open a door unexpectedly, out of the nowhere, in the middle of the darkest corridor.
So with all that warm-fuzzy speech making... let me offer this... from one searcher to another.
Dear Father, thank you for Your sacrifice on the cross, that pardoned us from Your wrath and connected us to Your grace. Thank you for Your triumph over the tomb, a victory which You have extended to us as well. The cosmos are Your works, and that is testimony to us that nothing is impossible to You, Lord. At this time in Laurie's life, when the marvelous talents and ability You have blessed her with are seeming to be ignored and stifled by the direction life has taken, please comfort and encourage her that this too shall pass, and that she was not given these gifts in vain. Renew her mind so she is ready, according to Your will, when you re-open the door for her--and she can continue, and accomplish the work that You designed her spirit for. Please don't tary Lord, with that door's opening, for her passion to get going again burns like a torch that she can just barely hold onto against its heat. Thank you for giving Laurie this gift, Father, for her fire and drive are testimonies that You chose her well. In Jesus' holy name we pray. Amen.
Posts: 223 | From: california | Registered: Feb 2004
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HisGrace
unregistered
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posted
Looks like the Lord is teaching you many lessons in humility and patience right now Laurie.
He wants us to learn to be totally submissive and yielding to him. Sometimes these lessons seem to take forever.
Will be keeping you in my prayers. ![[Prayer]](graemlins/prayer.gif)
Psalm 68:19
Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior,who daily bears our burdens.
I've heard it said "Burden him with what burdens you." Turn it completely over to him with faith and trust.
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LaurieFL
Advanced Member
Member # 3794
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posted
I am going through a difficult time emotionally. I have been out of work for most of the past 18 months or so. I was the primary supporter of my family prior to that, while my fiance (now husband) went mostly without work due to having to follow me around the country as I pursued my career.
Well, now he has a job in his career field, which is awesome. It doesn't pay anywhere near what I made though, so I really still desperately need a job. Now I am restricted to this location to which we have moved, something that in my field often means something tantamount to impossibility for re-employment in field. (I am a scientist). I am wondering if God wants me to change fields, since I have had such a difficult time finding work in my field, but I have no idea how to tell - I just pray and pray.
I have been applying for any and all jobs I can find, such as grocery clerk, etc. So far no one will hire me, because I know they have doubts about hiring someone who has more education than needed for the position and a salary history so different from that of the position for which I am applying.
Also, I am really finding it difficult to adjust to the role of homemaker and caretaker of my husband. He always took care of me for the most part. I barely know how to cook and I hate doing it so much, and he enjoys cooking so he always did all of that (I never minded housework other than cooking). I am finding this so stressful.
I imagine God is trying to teach me to be a humble servant, as selfish ambition and out of control ego are what caused me a lot of problems prior to my rededication to Christ. It sure isn't easy though, because I am concerned about money, concerned about my future (what am I to do with my life?), and I feel really incompetent in the home and lonely and insignificant. To make matters worse, we had to move for his new job, so I had to leave my church home which was the most awesome place I have ever known, so I feel I have lost that support system.
I am praying about all of this of course, but I ask that you all pray for me too.
Posts: 700 | Registered: Aug 2004
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